I didn't post anything on or around Tyler's born date this year and am finally posting an update.  Life goes on as usual, but not a day goes by that I don't wonder or think about him.  I didn't post an update or do a balloon release or write a letter this year. Honestly, I wasn't quite sure what I wanted or needed to do so I just sat on it for a while.  In addition to that, I was trying to get some dental work done when I found out just how high my blood pressure was and was working on trying to get that under control when tragedy struck our family.  On February 28 my oldest brother Bruce was in a motorcycle accident, and on March 11 he passed away from his injuries.  For the past 6 months we have all been dealing with our loss, and no, it hasn't gotten any easier.  But, I'm going to save that for a later blog.

Since I'm a children's book author and have been saying I'm going to write a book called Tyler's Footprints, I think it's about time I actually put some quality time into that project.  It's time to write another book, and my heart is leading me to write this one...finally.  I know I have two main goals for this book:  1) I want to do it justice and not half-ass.  I want to write a book that Tyler would be proud of if it's going to bear his name.  2) I want to help other children (and hopefully parents, too) with the subject of sibling loss whether it's similar to our story or not.  It's confusing and there are a lot of questions that go unanswered as an adult so I can imagine the thoughts and emotions that a child have when they learn their sibling is dying or has died or died before their own existence.  I believe things happen for a reason and that it's God's plan so this book will be religious/spiritual based, but I also don't want it to sound too preachy or explanations to sound too simplistic or have a sense of non-chalance to them.  I hope it can help kids grasp a faith-based understanding of why that their little heads can wrap their minds around it.  Sounds like an easy task, right?  Not for this ol' gal, but I'm going to do my best.  This will probably be one of the hardest books for me to write because as you can imagine, I'm going to get all up in my head and my feels.  For this I'm going to need a lot of solitude so I can have my meltdowns if they come, which they probably will.  I'm going to need to do a lot of research.  Since my current employment is about to come to an end in a few weeks, and I'll be taking a break, I believe I'll have that time I need to focus on this project and hopefully many others.  I honestly would like for Tyler's Footprints to come out next Christmas.  This Christmas would be nice, but I don't want to rush it, and I don't believe I'll have it justifiably done by this Christmas.  Also, there is/are illustrator(s) I'll need to hire, and that will depend on what kind of budget I have while I'm "taking a break" on unemployment and then consequently my next source of employment.  So...watch for Tyler's Footprints out next fall/Christmas season.  Any prayers or good vibes you'd like to send my way would be appreciated.  Thank you and God bless!